Samus

'''Warning. This Article contains the spoiler that Samus is a girl.'''

...So, if you don't want to find out that Samus is a girl, which she is, don't read it.

...Because Samus is a girl

Samus (Also known as "Metroid" by people who've never played the games, and "Sam's House" by Smash Players) is Hawt  a bounty-hunter-space-pirate-killing-galatactic-federation-helping-metoid-hunting lady. She shoots Metoids and Pirates, and is constantly murdering Ridley. This is because He murdered her parents. CUZ SHE'S BATMAN. She has an odd obsession with shooting every single goddamn door she finds, instead of opening it like a normal person. Probably because her suit has a cannon for an arm. She is part birb, and her favorite food is worms.

Physical Appearance
Samus has a pair of huge( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)Shoulders, and a thick breast( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) plate, with spiky shoes, and Kneepads so sharp that if she kneeled she would impale herself. She has a giant arm cannon that can shoot da Metoids, and can Blow up da pirates. She uses her Screwattack to murder more Pirates. She also has a dope visor that looks epic. She can also turn into a 🅱️ALL.

Personality
NoNe UnTiL oThEr M hUrR dUrR

Trivia

 * Many people wonder what happens to Samus when she morphs into a ball. It's really rather simple. Just imagine shoving your head into your butt and folding your legs backwards over your back and also shoving your feet into your butt while you lock your fingers and squeeze yourself very hard. This is what she does.
 * Samus started walking at the incredibly young age of 7 months, entirely skipping the crawling stage! While this is an impressive achievement, she never actually took the time to learn to crawl later in life.
 * Samus's ability to continually spin jump without getting dizzy is mainly due to neurological defects in her vestibular system. This is also the reason why she has so much trouble getting on those damn save stations in Super Metroid.
 * The Chozo that raised Samus were training her to be the perfect bowling ball. Her featherless body creates a much better aerodynamic ball than that of the Chozo.
 * Samus has two webbed toes, as she only has two toes per foot due to her being a bird-human hybrid and an abomination against nature.